Mixed Up By Tineka Smith and Alex Court

Tineka Smith always knew that growing up Black in America meant certain restrictions. Don’t talk back to white people; expect to be stopped by the police; always be on your guard. So, when she moved to the UK – and fell in love with Alex Court, a white man – she wondered if things might be different. When Alex proposed to Tineka, it was the easiest decision in the world. What he didn’t anticipate was the reaction – sometimes subtle, sometimes overt – from friends and strangers alike. Nor did he expect to have to think about Tineka’s race, and his own white privilege, every single day. Tineka has always felt the burden of calling out and educating people, only now she has to teach her new husband at the same time – asking him to see, hear and think with a new perspective about the things he had never noticed before. But what does this mean for Tineka and Alex’s relationship? With anecdotes, analysis and honest conversations, Mixed Up has the pair attempting to navigate their new and challenging world, confronting race and relationships in the 21st century head on.

‘Mixed Up’ is the first book that I’ve listened to on Audible and it was a book that triggered a lot of thoughts and emotions on my daily commute.

It’s fair to say that 2020 has been a difficult year with the pandemic that has taken over the world but it’s also the year that there has been a more prominent shift in attitudes of what it means to be a person of colour in the 21st century.

With the deaths of George Flloyd and Breonna Taylor, people are standing up for the treatment of black people and protesting for equality across the world.

This book could have easily been a love story, boy meets girl, fall in love and live happily ever after, but instead this book is frustrating of acceptance, racism and denial.

The book is seen through the narrative of interracial married couple Tineka Smith and Alex Court and they discuss honestly and frankly the complexities and racism that they have experienced in their relationship.

They give their opinions on situations that they have been in, the different perspectives and why they chose to behave in the way that they did and this, honestly makes for interesting and frustrating listening.

I think the stories that particularly effected me where the interactions between Tineka and Alex, when she felt he didn’t support her and me as a woman, I also felt that way. I was frustrated and disappointed that he didn’t support her on the train when an elderly woman questioned the way, she was sitting and when a supposed friend, critiqued her work ethic and Alex didn’t back her then. It’s interesting listening to them talk about those situations and how they both reacted in the way that they did and their own version of events.

I felt such sympathy for Tineka, as a woman we’re already being judged on our gender but for her, she also has to deal with being a black woman and falling in love with a white man. Her stories are hard hitting and honest and it makes for fascinating listening as she challenges Alex on his behaviour and he acknowledges that he should have behaved differently in certain scenarios. Tineka is not only receiving judgement from white people, but also people from her own race when a black man spat on her after seeing her kiss her white husband.

Hard-hitting and showing that the 21st century is still from far accepting the reality of interracial couples’. Mixed Up’ gives a sad and frustrating insight into the consequences of an interracial relationship, the judgement and the questions that they face and highlights the easier life that people in a same race couple easily take for granted.

You can buy ‘Mixed Up’ from Amazon